Starting from the bottom, I’d disagree that XDCR can replace a backup: XDCR will replicate your mistakes thus deleting data accidentally is not something XDCR protect against. I’d highly recommend taking backups with couchbase server even if you XDCR to another cluster for higher availability under certain types failure. Backups do work on community edition except incremental and cumulative backups.
You should be able to pause and resume in the community edition with 3.0 couchbase-cli tool. The options is there under XDCR-replicate options. Are you sure you have the latest version of the cli in the path?
–create create and start a new replication
–delete stop and cancel a replication
–list list all xdcr replications
–pause pause the replication
–resume resume the replication
–settings update settings for the replication